Hard day.

This past week of work was really tough. Sometimes it just catches up with me. Monday morning I got to work and found out that one of my favorite patients, one I have blogged about often (not orange juice man), was having difficulty swallowing. So I evaluated him and found he was unable to swallow anything, so they sent him to the hospital. Tuesday morning, I hear that one of our ladies died over the night. I wasn't that close to her, but she was one of my patient's at one point. Then I go and do therapy with the roomate of the man we sent to the hospital. He was very lethargic and I let him be after a few minutes, as he was inappropriate for therapy. I went to talk to the nurse, who informed me that the cancer was out of control and that he was in the process of dying. I then run into the family member of the lady who died, and the sister hugs me and it was really tough. They were cleaning out her room. That is tough to watch. I then ran into the director of nursing, who told me they were sending my man back from the hospital on hospice, with orders not to be fed, as he is unable to swallow anything without it going into his lungs. This is an alert, oriented man who's little wife comes to see him everyday. He is so fun to talk to and it just absolutely broke my heart. This was the point where I just let it out. I love these patient's so much, and I know that it may seem funny that I seem so shocked when they pass, but when you are with them on a daily basis and are forming relationships with them, you forget the prognosis that they have. I love what I do, but somedays it all catch up with me and hit at once. Just needed to share.